Can't Let Go Page 10

  Grace did notice that sometimes Evie became so agitated that nothing would calm her. When Evie saw Grace, she calmed slightly but Evie still fretted and looked around as if expecting Casey to come out of hiding. It was hard for Grace to see her hurting so she took to rocking Evie at these times and murmuring Casey’s favorite song. Maggie would tactfully leave during those times which Grace appreciated. Sometimes she couldn’t stop the tears that were always near the surface.

  Maggie was a huge help. She kept the condo clean, cooked and tended to Evie all without breaking a sweat. Grace had no idea how she did it but she learned a lot from the older woman who informed her she was holding Evie wrong and corrected Evie’s diet and Grace’s. Grace was too busy to notice.

  That weekend Grace dressed to impress in a one shoulder violet dress that was comfortable yet stylish. It was in the window of her boutique and she knew the designer would be at this function tonight. She really liked him and if she was going to be photographed it should benefit someone. Maggie’s brows nearly hit her hairline when Grace came out of her room while putting on tear drop diamond earrings.

  “Hot date?” Maggie asked.

  Grace snorted. “Dinner party at one of my client’s house. Can’t get out of it.”

  Maggie cocked her head to the side. “You don’t have a man?”

  “Had one. Don’t need him.”

  Maggie saluted her with the bottle she was holding. “You knock ‘em dead.”

  Grace went over to Evie and hugged her. “You be good, baby. I’ll be back soon.”

  She grabbed her clutch and closed the front door behind her and paused, surprised by the ache in her chest. How was it possible that she missed Evie already? She pushed it away and went down to the cab waiting for her. She tapped her shoe restlessly as the car took her to her client’s house. This was her first public outing since she came back and she didn’t know what people were going to ask or how blunt they were going to be. She saw glimpses of the headlines on the magazines where people speculated on her and Mitchell’s relationship status. Really, did people have nothing better to do? It enraged her that Casey’s death was mentioned in a footnote. The press didn’t consider Casey worth mentioning or mourning. Grace stopped in the middle of an article that stated that the reason Mitchell hadn’t reconciled with her was because she was taking care of Evie. She felt sick to her stomach and hadn’t looked at another since. Reporters called and she considered changing her number but that wouldn’t stop them.

  Mitchell hadn’t tried to contact her even once since they returned to New York. That’s what she’d wanted, wasn’t it? She tried to shrug off how uncomfortable and angry it made her. There was a ninety percent chance he would be there tonight. It was just business between them. No more. Then why had she lain awake at night thinking about him? Because she was an idiot, that’s why. She had enough on her plate just trying to shuffle through her paperwork and dealing with Evie and the bouts of grief that attacked without warning.

  She glanced at her phone and saw she had several messages but none were from her mother. Why hadn’t she called? If Vicky was in New York there was no way to avoid seeing her own daughter’s face on the cover of the gossip magazines. Vicky would see Grace with Evie and know something happened to Casey. Didn’t she care? The last time she saw her mother was the day she left Mitchell. She left the penthouse and went straight to Casey’s apartment to find her mother there, railing at a sobbing Casey to have an abortion. Even now, the memory was enough to make Grace’s blood boil. Casey was on all fours as her mouth struck her. Grace, heart already in shreds went crazy and shoved Vicky away from Casey and screamed at her to leave.

  “Look who’s here, Ms. High and Mighty herself,” Vicky sneered as Grace helped Casey to her feet. Vicky got a look at Grace’s chalky white face and red rimmed eyes. “What happened to you?”

  “None of your business,” Grace hissed. “What are you doing here?”

  “Checking on Casey like I always do and what do I find out? That she’s gotten herself knocked up by some nobody! You knew about this?” Vicky demanded.

  Grace set Casey on the couch where she hunched over and cried pitifully. Grace faced her mother.

  “You’re drunk,” she said in disgust. “Get out of here.”

  “Just because you’re screwing Mitchell Price doesn’t mean you can order your own mother around,” Vicky shouted, swaying. “You think he’s going to give you a ring? You’re just as stupid as Casey. You’re still on the pill, aren’t you? I told you to get off of those and trap him before he loses interest. You’re too damn proud for your own good.”

  Grace withstood the verbal blows and didn’t care that tears poured down her face. She knew firsthand what it felt like to try and trap a man like Mitchell Price. Even Vicky who despised her knew she wouldn’t trap Mitchell so why had he thought so?

  Vicky was aggravated by Grace’s silence. “Think you’re better than us now that you make your own money? Think I’m trash because I’m making your daddy pay for not leaving his wife?” An evil smile curved her mouth. “I promised your daddy I would never reveal his name but the irony of you being in his inner circles must kill him. If you only knew!” Vicky cackled.

  Grace stared at her mother, wondering if she was insane. She turned to Casey and murmured in her ear to pack a bag, that they were leaving New York. Casey nodded and went to her room as Grace faced Vicky.

  “I saw you in a group picture,” Vicky said, shaking her head. “How he must hate you! And there you are, snuggled up with his best friend’s son.” Vicky came forward and studied Grace’s bloodless face with glassy eyes. “When he looks at you, he sees me. Good for him. It’s what he deserves.”

  Even through the numb haze she was encased in, Grace’s mind went into overdrive. “Ray’s my father?” Her voice was flat.

  Vicky laughed uproariously, slapping her bony legs. The beauty that had once attracted successful men to her was gone. Her hair was frizzy and dry, face wrinkled before her time due to alcohol and drugs and bitterness.

  “You get your brains from me, girl!” Vicky crowed.

  “Get out,” Grace said.

  “Tell him I said hi the next time you see him,” Vicky giggled and left, slamming the door behind her.

  She hadn’t seen Vicky since then. A part of her was glad she didn’t have to deal with Vicky and the other part was outraged that she didn’t even care that Casey was gone. What kind of mother did that? If she had parents like Ray and Vicky, what type of guardian did that make her? Grace rubbed her hands down suddenly chilled arms as the cab came to a stop. Her door was opened by a uniformed man who took her hand to help her out. She was instantly blinded by camera flashes and she pasted on a smile she knew would pass muster.

  An arm slipped around her waist and she stiffened before looking up at Landon who grinned broadly down at her.

  “Look who’s here, Ms. Mysterious herself,” he said and leaned down to kiss her cheek.

  There were excited yells from the paparazzi and then more camera flashes. She was actually relieved to see Landon. Going through the whole night without a companion would have been a drag. Landon escorted her up the stairs.

  “Where’s Mitchell?” he asked.

  “No idea,” Grace said lightly.

  Landon shook his head. “You two have a strange relationship.”

  “We’re business partners.”

  His snort told her what he thought of that. When they paused at the entrance of the house he squeezed her side. “I’m sorry about your sister.”

  She nodded briskly. “So am I. I have my good and bad days. I’m just coping right now.”

  “You’re one strong lady,” he said and led her into battle.

  Ricky, the designer of her dress came darting through the crowd and examined his creation critically before he beamed and kissed both her cheeks.

  “You look beautiful,” Ricky said and then slid an admiring glance at Landon.

  “Ricky, this is Landon,
Landon this is Ricky, the designer of the dress I’m wearing,” Grace said.

  “Pleasure,” Landon said and shook Ricky’s hand.

  “Are you with this hunk or the other one?” Ricky asked bluntly once he focused on Grace again. “I’m confused.”

  Grace grinned, relaxing slightly when Landon laughed. “I’m not with either of them. We’re friends.”

  “Well, Mr. Dark and Broody is on his way over here,” Ricky said with a glance over Grace’s shoulder.

  She’d known where he was, had felt his eyes on her as soon as she stepped through the door. Ricky scampered away as Mitchell faced her and Landon. She had an odd feeling of déjà vu.

  “Mitchell,” Grace said evenly.

  “Landon,” Mitchell said with a threat in his voice and then focused on her. “Grace.”

  Grace looked beyond him and saw Ray heading towards them. He had a smile on his face but she saw the menace in his eyes, the hatred he saved for her alone. When he joined their circle Grace sent him a tight smile.

  “Oh Ray, you just made my night,” Grace said sweetly.

  Mitchell glanced at Ray who took Grace’s hand and kissed it. Grace hid her flinch as Ray crushed her hand, hidden from the other two men by his bent head. She swiftly retracted her hand and flexed it in the folds of her dress. She didn’t have the energy to take on Mitchell or Ray.

  “Excuse us,” she murmured without looking at either of them.

  Mitchell stepped forward, invading her space. She was forced to look up into his face. He ignored Landon’s presence.

  “How’s Evie?” he asked.

  If you called you would know, she wanted to say but she didn’t. “Fine.” She tried to sidle away but he reached out and grabbed her arm.

  When Landon made a move to intervene Mitchell said in a low voice, “You know she’s mine.”

  Grace’s mouth dropped even as Mitchell and Landon sized each other up. Whatever was in Mitchell’s face convinced Landon to back off because he sighed.

  “If you need me, I’ll be here,” Landon said and his gaze slid from her to a voluptuous blonde who walked forward and pressed her breast against his arm.

  “Mitchell,” Ray said in a warning hiss but Mitchell shook his head.

  “Leave us,” he said to Ray.

  Grace blinked in surprise. She’d never heard Mitchell talk to Ray that way before. She couldn’t stop a spurt of satisfaction when she saw the shock on Ray’s face and then the hurt. He shot her one last fuming glance before he walked away.

  “Wine?” a waitress asked, extending her tray towards them.

  “Please,” Grace said, taking a glass.

  She was very aware all the eyes were on them and wished Mitchell would just leave it be. From the very beginning their relationship had been a battle of wills. He was the only one she’d ever lost to and she didn’t intend to now. The stakes were too high and she couldn’t afford to fall into a maelstrom of depression like the last time. She had Evie now and she had to be there for her every step of the way. She wouldn’t be like her parents.

  She looked up at him with raised brows and refused to show how much he unsettled her. She didn’t want the gossip, didn’t want Mitchell hovering around her and she definitely didn’t want the feelings he stirred in her: anger, need, frustration, love. How could she still love the bastard?

  “You wanted to talk to me?” she said coolly.

  He leaned down and pressed a kiss on her shocked lips. He’d never been one for public affection and the way he was staking his claim so publicly sent a chill of alarm through her. Yes, there were rumors but what he was doing now in front of their peers was cementing a relationship she didn’t want. She tried to pull back but he cupped the back of her head with one hand and kept her still until he was satisfied.

  “Mitchell,” she whispered.

  He pulled back and kissed her again. The kiss was consuming, determined and possessive. When he drew away his eyes were hot with desire. “I don’t like seeing you with him.”

  “We’re friends,” she murmured, wondering if that’s what prompted him to take a leaf out of Tarzan’s book.

  His hand rubbed over her cheek. “You don’t need him. You need me.”

  Her mouth formed a thin line. “Actually, I don’t. I can handle everything myself.”

  Someone coughed loudly and Mitchell shot someone a chilling glance over her head and then jerked his head, dismissing them. Mitchell pulled Grace into a library and closed the door behind them. Grace stared as he locked the door and came towards her. He was in a strange mood she couldn’t define.

  “What are you doing?” she demanded. “You’re putting on this show for everyone to make them think we’re together but why?”

  “I’m tired of waiting for you to forgive me,” he stated.

  She almost dropped her glass of wine. “Excuse me?”

  He came to stand directly before her. “I screwed up and I don’t know what I have to do to get you back. I can’t keep my distance and I don’t want to. I want you back. I want Evie too.”

  She was speechless for a full minute. Her mind was whirling. She saw the frustration in his eyes and his body was tight with tension. Where was all of this coming from?

  “Mitchell,” she said, talking slowly as she would to a crazy man.

  “I know what I want.”

  She set her wine glass down very carefully. “And what exactly do you want?”

  “I want you… and Evie.”

  She threw her hands up. “What you’re saying you want, you crucified me for a year ago! You don’t know what you want. You think I would go back to you just because we slept together again?”

  “Being with you in Texas made me realize how much I miss you and Evie made us a family. People thought she was mine. She likes me,” he said defensively.

  “You want a family?” she choked.

  Panic crawled over her body like spiders. She was starting to feel claustrophobic. He wanted her now because he was ready to settle down and she already came with a baby?

  He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m messing this up. I want you and you have Evie so I’ll take both of you. I like Evie, she likes me so…”

  He was saying this all in a reasonable tone as if it made sense but she couldn’t see the logic. Mitchell was one of the most ambitious, restless people she knew. He wasn’t satisfied with anything but the best and she knew what it felt like for him to see you as a last resort. He never dated women with children. He wanted his kids to be his- with no doubts. He wasn’t the type of guy to embrace someone else’s children. What if he decided one day that he wanted his own? She already knew he wouldn’t want them from her.

  “Maybe you are ready to settle down.”

  He nodded and took her cold hands. “I am.”

  “Maybe you liked the idea of being a father since you’ve had time to think about it,” she paused and ignored the ache in the pit of her stomach. “But I don’t think that has anything to do with Evie or me. Maybe you should start looking for a wife and then-”

  He let out a strangled growl. “You’re the one I want.”

  “No. I’m not. My mom is still a blackmailing alcoholic and I’m still the girl from the other side of the tracks. I told you, we’re over.”

  “God, why can’t you be like your name? You can’t give me grace? You won’t let me in one tiny inch-”

  “Because I don’t have anything left!” she shouted and the tears she’d been holding back filled her eyes. “Damn, I loved you with everything I had and when you accused me of trying to trick you I couldn’t believe you thought so little of me. Why would I do that to a man when it turned my mom into what she is today? I, better than anyone else knows what that feels like.”

  “And you never shared any of it with me!” he shouted back. “You may have loved me, you slept with me, did business with me but never once did you tell me about your background. What was I supposed to think?”

  Her head was pounding. “I did
n’t come here for this.”

  “Even if I make you a promise you won’t believe me, will you?” he hissed.

  She shook her head and grabbed a Kleenex and dabbed at her eyes so her makeup wouldn’t be destroyed. She grabbed the tatters of her composure and drained her wine glass and started for the door.

  “You can’t ignore me forever,” Mitchell said from behind her.

  “I have business to see to,” she said and unlocked the door and stepped out.

  Her hands shook but she schooled her expression into a reassuring smile as she walked towards a circle of people. They made room for her and looked over her shoulder at the library door which remained closed. Ricky hooked his arm through hers supportively.

  She wasn’t sure how she got through the night but she did. Mitchell never reappeared. When she got back to her condo she was glad Maggie didn’t wait up. Grace walked into her room, let her dress fall to the bathroom floor and got into the shower where sobbed her heart out for what she couldn’t have because she didn’t have the courage to take a chance on him again.

  Chapter Ten

  Grace walked into the condo and was greeted by Maggie who had her hands on hips.

  “She screamed all day,” Maggie informed her crossly.

  Grace dropped her briefcase and rushed to the nursery.

  “Why did she cry? Is there something wrong?” Grace demanded

  She leaned over the crib to brush Evie’s sweaty hair back from her face. “Did I forget to buy her something she needs? Is she not eating right?”

  “No. She needs you.”

  Grace stiffened and turned to her. “I can’t right now. I’m trying to keep the boutique on track.”

  She walked out of the nursery with Maggie hot on her heels. It had been two weeks since the party and she’d thrown herself into work. She was back to fifty hours a week and she was rarely home. She felt as if she were on the verge of breaking and she knew she needed to slow down but she didn’t know how. The only way she knew to rid herself of heartache was to work herself to sleep.