Lost in Wolf Dreams (Cormac's Pack) Page 3

  Jillian held up her mother’s engagement ring, a thin band with a round diamond in the middle. When Jillian found out about her father, she asked her mom why she kept the ring he gave her. Her mom smiled, cupped Jillian’s face and said, “I love him because he gave me you.” Jillian’s heart wrenched in her chest and she took a deep, steadying breath.

  “Tell me everything.”

  “I don’t think you’re ready for that.”

  She met his eyes. “I’ll be the judge of what I can or can’t handle, not you.”

  “I don’t know everything. Whenever I asked you something directly, you’d start rearranging my furniture or turn into a feral wolf.”

  Jillian’s eyes fixed on a point beyond him. He couldn’t read her face. He wanted to sit beside her and pull her onto his lap, but he knew she would fight him. Jillian was the most independent, stubborn, contained woman he’d ever met. He knew getting her to trust him was going to be an uphill battle, again, and he wasn’t looking forward to it. If Jillian trusted her wolf, it would tell her he could be trusted, but Jillian the human didn’t trust anyone but herself.

  “Someone in your building called the cops when they heard a commotion in your apartment. The cop opened your door, saw a wolf and called me.”

  “You’re a wolf cop?” she asked without emotion.

  “I’m a freelance enforcer. Usually wolves only go into cities for thrills and then leave. Any problems with wolves, the city cops know to call me.”

  “People know about shifters?”

  “Some do. Enough to call me when there’s a problem. Those that don’t believe get a pill ground up in their drink that makes them think it was all just a bad dream.” When she didn’t respond to that he continued, “I walked into your apartment. You were half shifted and covered in blood. Your mom was in your arms. She and the two wolf shifters were dead.”

  Bile rose in Jillian’s throat. “D-did I kill-”

  Mac’s silver eyes acted as a mirror, reflecting her horrified face back at her. “You killed the wolves. Your mom had a bullet in her head.”

  Jillian bolted off the stool and ran into the forest as her stomach heaved. She couldn’t comprehend what Mac was saying. Her mom was shot? She killed two wolves? Her mind reeled and she stayed on her hands and knees as she tried to get her thoughts in order, but they skittered everywhere. She couldn’t accept that her mom was dead. No. She needed proof.

  “Jillian,” Mac said cautiously behind her.

  Fire jetted down her spine. Jillian gasped and tilted her head back. Sunlight blinded her and she closed her eyes as she felt her body snap and contort. Her spine curved and she hit the ground so hard, her palms sank two inches into moist earth. She felt her jaw extend and it was a mixture of pain and elation. She tried to rein in her wolf, but the creature inside her was too strong. The wolf rammed at Jillian’s shaky control and shouldered her aside. Jillian was so shell shocked, she willingly faded into the background and let the wolf take over.

  Chapter Four

  Jillian’s wolf tilted her head back and howled. The mournful song was haunting and when she heard another wolf join in, she stopped. For the first time, the wolf and Jillian wanted the same thing- to run. Jillian’s wolf took off, paws digging into the earth as they dodged between trees and up and over hills so fast Jillian felt as if she was flying. She could smell rabbit, deer, squirrels and foxes. She didn’t question how she knew the scent of each animal. The warmth of the sun had no effect on the chill in her bones.

  She felt as if she could run for hours and would have, except a large black wolf suddenly appeared in front of her. He was twice as large as her and the tips of his fur had a dark red tint to it. Silver eyes compelled her to turn back. Jillian snarled and pivoted to go around him. He swiftly cut her off and when their eyes met, Jillian’s wolf acknowledged that she wouldn’t get past him. She bared her teeth and turned back the way she’d come. She tried her best to outrun the black wolf that followed, but no matter how fast she was, he herded her where he wanted her to go. At some point, she came across a stream and deliberately splashed the black wolf on her tail. She heard a hiss and took off at a dead run and stopped, ears perked. Something large moved through the forest. She trotted forward, even as she sensed the black wolf pick up speed and bark in warning.

  A huge creature crossed her path and she stumbled back as she took in the wild scent. The black wolf inserted himself between Jillian and the bear, growling low in his throat. The bear swiped out at them. The black wolf urged Jillian back and growled low in his throat as they loped around the predator who watched them with hostile black eyes. When Jillian tried to sidle away, Mac nipped her shoulder and bodily guided her back to the cabin. She stopped on the fringes of the yard and stood beneath the shelter of trees. She could smell gas in the parked SUV, the smell of her lotion in the room she once occupied and her mother’s ring on the ground nearby.

  Mac put his mouth on her shoulder and bit down hard. Jillian’s wolf reacted savagely, bucking and snapping her teeth. Mac didn’t release his hold and used his larger frame to shove her on her back. Jillian clawed at him and his fangs sank deeper. The pain made Jillian break out of the killing haze. She swam to the surface and shoved her savage wolf to the side. Jillian lay very still. Mac sensed who was in charge now. Slowly, he withdrew his teeth and looked down at her. He waffled in her face and licked her muzzle before his body contorted. In less than thirty-seconds, a naked man with hands on his hips glared down at her.

  “Shift,” he commanded.

  Even as Jillian tried to ask him how the hell she was supposed to do that, he started muttering under his breath. Since there was no way to communicate, she got to her feet. She smelled the sharp tang of her blood and shot Mac a withering glare he ignored. She limped and rolled her wounded shoulder as she tried to think of a way to get out of her wolf form. She tamped down her anxiety because that wouldn’t do any good. She barked in Mac’s face and mentally screamed, How the fuck do I get out of this?

  Mac crossed his arms over his chest. “You have to find a reason to be human.”

  Her thoughts immediately focused on the bastards that shot her mother and her hackles rose. The wolf began to snarl and Jillian struggled to keep her mind from filming over with bloodlust. Mac walked away and picked something out of the grass. He knelt in front of Jillian without fear and held up her mother’s engagement ring. Jillian focused and her heart swelled. Rage faded and was replaced by a grief so deep, the physical pain of shifting back into a human didn’t bother her at all. Jillian trembled on the ground with tears sliding down her cheeks. She felt Mac slip the ring on her finger and scoop her up. He walked into the cabin and set her in the bedroom where all her possessions were.

  Sorrow made her shiver uncontrollably. Mac slipped into bed with her. She tried to scoot away from his naked body, but he wrapped himself around her and engulfed her in heat. She fought him on principle, not wanting to accept his comfort, but he was so much stronger than her and she was exhausted. She went limp against him and let out a keening sound that made him tighten his hold. He rested his chin on top of her head and murmured soothingly to her while his hands moved over her back soothingly. She wriggled and slapped his chest.

  “Wolves need touch,” he reminded her.

  She shook her head and choked, “I don’t.”

  “God, don’t tell me we have to go through the whole ‘don't touch me’ shit again. That was hell.”

  “I-I’m fine,” Jillian said through chattering teeth.

  “Can’t you just let me do this for you? Christ!” Mac snapped. “You think you always have to be strong, always have to be alone. You don’t have to. I’m here.”

  “I’ve never shifted before,” she said hoarsely.

  “You shift when you’re emotional.”

  “I’m never emotional,” she said raggedly as tears poured down her face.

  His hand slid into her hair and his strong fingers gently massage her scalp. “You are the most
stubborn woman I’ve ever met.”

  “You don’t know how to take no for an answer,” she countered, melting against him as the pain in her head began to ease.

  “No, I don’t,” he agreed and pressed a kiss to her temple.

  Jillian nipped his chest and felt his muscles ripple beneath her teeth. Mac didn’t retaliate. She was too tired to protest and although she wouldn’t admit it, she didn’t want to be alone. She wouldn’t accept that her mom was truly gone, no matter what he said. Not yet. Tears slid from her eyes and she slipped into never-ending darkness where there was no light or hope.

  She moaned and clutched the bed sheets on either side of her. She writhed and tried to kick, but calloused hands subdued her and spread her thighs wider. Her hands clutched thick black hair and she tried to pull that wicked tongue away from her, but the man groaned in pleasure and didn’t budge an inch. Her body quivered and he slid his hands beneath her ass and lifted her firmly against his mouth. She screamed as a vicious climax tore through her.

  She woke fully as hands slid over her belly and breasts and a mouth covered her own. She gasped as an erotic taste filled her mouth, she knew it was her own. Her lazy eyes flapped and she looked into glowing silver eyes. There was such hunger in those eyes, she would have run if she could move. Shocks rippled through her as Mac pushed his cock into her with no effort. Mac groaned into her mouth as he thrust. She gasped, still sensitive and recovering from her climax. When her claws sank into the mattress, he moved them to his shoulders.

  “Touch me,” he said.

  She didn’t want to hurt him. When she tried to pull away, he flashed sharp fangs and she froze. Jillian should have been scared shitless instead of turned on.

  “I want you to mark me.”

  She couldn’t speak. She didn’t even know this guy, but she was having sex with him! Amazing sex, she corrected herself. Mac buried his face against her neck and licked. She wanted him to move, but he seemed content to taste her skin rather than get them both off. She wanted to kill him.

  “Just do me!” Jillian hissed.

  She’d never been so sexually frustrated in her life. She was always in control, but this guy… Mac made it clear he was running the show. He made her feel desperate. When he released her hands, she shoved him onto his back and straddled him. Silver eyes watched as she rocked. She closed her eyes, so she didn’t have to see him. He threw off her rhythm by sitting up and scooting back so that he leaned against the headboard. She had to crawl to keep him inside of her and as she positioned herself once more, realized they were suddenly face to face.

  “Do you want me, Jillian?”

  She didn’t respond. She continued to move her hips, trying not to touch him because she just needed this orgasm and then she needed to get away from this psycho sex god. She gripped the headboard for leverage. They both groaned and he clasped her face and kissed her. His tongue dueled with hers and it was so erotic, she leaned into him, teeth and all and heard the wood beneath her grip splinter. Her breasts touched his chest and she felt his lips curve in satisfaction. She tried to ride him, but his body was so large her legs couldn’t touch the mattress on either side of him. She let out a frustrated hiss.

  “Finish what you started,” she ordered.

  He just stared at her.

  “I need to…”

  He leaned forward and licked her lips. “Do you want me?”

  “Yes!”

  When he didn’t shift, she grabbed his head and knocked it hard against the headboard. He wasn’t angry. If anything, he looked delighted by her violence. Appalled by her actions and the desire pumping through her blood, she rolled off him, but didn’t make it far. He tackled her on her stomach and slid his cock into her from behind. She arched and tried to get him to move, but he kept her pinned. She turned her head and his hot breath fanned her cheek. She was so horny, she was ready to tear the bed apart.

  “Mac!” she shouted.

  “Promise me you won’t run again.”

  It took her a few moments to process that and then she snapped, “If I want to leave, I will!”

  One of his hands gripped the base of her throat and squeezed. “You’ll talk to me before you leave. Deal?”

  She hesitated and tried to push back, but he didn’t move. He had iron control over himself and it infuriated her. If she couldn’t feel him trembling with the need to come, she would think he didn’t want her.

  “Fine,” she hissed.

  He slammed into her so hard, she bowed down as if she were meeting a sultan, hands splayed out in front of her, head down. Mac grabbed her hips and screwed her like his life depended on it. Jillian’s claws shredded the sheets. She felt his claws sink into her skin and draw blood. She reveled in the strength of his need for her. Right before she came, he flipped her so they were face to face. She went wild beneath him, claws raking over his chest and arms as he sent them both over the edge. Her scream joined his howl and she saw stars. Mac sank onto her and she let her shaking legs fall to the bed and unsheathed her claws from his flesh. She couldn’t stop trembling. She didn’t even know him! What was she doing? She stared up at the open beam ceiling.

  She slapped Mac as he sank onto her. “What the hell was that?”

  “An awesome fuck,” he groaned.

  Jillian raked her claws down his back and he bucked against her. She gasped because he was still inside of her. He crouched over her, eyes as bright as the moonlight that lit the bedroom. She’d just slept with a guy she didn’t even know and the smell of his blood scented the air.

  “Who said you could come in here and go down on me?” she demanded.

  Although she braced her hands on his shoulders, he cupped her face with one hand and gave her a sweet kiss. When he drew away, her lips were still puckered and her eyes were wide and confused.

  “I was comforting you,” he said with a grin.

  “I don’t need a pity fuck,” Jillian spat.

  “Babe,” he drawled as his eyes flicked over her. “This has nothing to do with pity.”

  She tried to draw the sheet over herself because she could feel herself getting hot and bothered again. What was wrong with her?! She liked sex as much as the next woman, but she’d never been as wild as she was with Mac… and she’d never begged before. She wanted to slap the satisfied smile off his face.

  “I told you, we’re together,” Mac said with a shrug. “Just because you don’t remember, doesn’t mean that wipes away everything that happened before.”

  Mac hopped off the bed, grabbed a robe and pulled her into a sitting position. She slapped his hands away, shrugged into the robe and tied the sash herself while she tried to regain her equilibrium.

  “I don’t know you!” she said deliberately. “Why don’t you understand that?”

  She stiffened when he splayed a hand over her abdomen.

  “Where did those bruises come from? Do they hurt?”

  “No, they don’t hurt and stop avoiding my question!”

  “You’re the one that doesn’t understand. You’re so busy pushing me away, you don’t realize I’m trying to help. I’m not going anywhere.” When she opened her mouth, he covered it with his hand. “I can’t start all over again or wait until your memory comes back. I haven’t been able to calm my wolf since you left.”

  She bit his hand. Wincing, Mac pulled away and tugged on jeans before he led her out of the bedroom to the kitchen.

  “I need time to figure this out,” she said stiffly as he pushed her onto a stool.

  “There’s nothing to figure out. Just trust me.”

  “I don’t know if I can do that.”

  “You trusted me enough to come here with me. Your wolf trusts me. Let her lead.”

  She folded her arms defensively across her chest and watched him nuke two frozen meals. Let her wolf make the decisions? That was smart- NOT! She looked around, distracted by the way the kitchen was organized. She could see her stamp here as well. Even as she scowled, Mac turned and shot her a
heated glance. No man ever looked at her like that. She was honestly perplexed by Mac. She was a self-contained, boring control freak. What did he see in her? According to him, the last time she’d been here, she was more wolf than human, yet he followed her to New York and brought her back. Why? Maybe he liked psychotic women. It must be a wolf thing.

  Mac set the frozen meal in front of her and she dug in. He ate standing on the other side of the island, watching her. She tried to ignore him, but it was hard when she could smell herself on him (damn her wolf nose) and he wore only a pair of jeans. She didn’t like the predatory look in his eyes because her body began to ache. How could she be turned on by a stranger? If she was in her right mind, she’d be walking out the door right now. Despite what happened in the bedroom, she had no idea what to think of Mac, the first wolf she could remember meeting. She needed a plan of action and she needed all the facts. The sooner she figured out what was going on here, the sooner she could execute a plan and be on her way. She pushed her tray away decisively.

  “If my mom was killed, why would I come here with you?”

  Mac didn’t look surprised by her question. “When I met you, you were feral. You were on a hair trigger and traumatized. I brought you here to give you a chance to heal.”

  Goosebumps rippled over her arms and she resisted the urge to shiver. She was suddenly cold again. Why couldn’t she remember any of this?

  “You say I disappeared a week ago?” she asked clinically, blocking out her anxiety.

  Mac shot her a furious glare. “Its like you disappeared into thin air. I didn’t know what to think.”

  “All I know is, I turned up at the cafe looking like Alice back from freaking Wonderland!” When Mac looked confused, she waved that away and tried to assimilate everything in her mind. She took a deep breath and tried to detach herself from the next line of questioning so her sated wolf wouldn’t lunge to the surface. “You say there was a burglary that night?”